Listen and check understanding · S9.9

Include your own needs when showing empathy

You are trying to understand someone else while dismissing your own feelings.

Everyday practice

Try these steps

1. Name what you think the other person may feel and check rather than assuming.
2. Name your own feeling or limit with the same respectful tone.
3. Choose a response that acknowledges both, including a boundary when needed.

An example

I hear that you want company. I care about you, and I need to rest tonight.

Reflect

Did either person's needs disappear from your response?

Next time

Practise the wording before another similar conversation if that would help.